After an afternoon with a friend of mine - having a delicious High Tea with sugar for my sweet tooth and carbs for my belly - we stopped at a shop that sells bijou. I didn't know it when we entered, but I ended up buying my friend a necklace to commemorate this special day. Not because we were celebrating a birthday. But because we have been friends for almost twelve years, and eventhough it's unlikely that I will remember every moment we've shared, my heart does remember.
I once read that the heart has a memory of its own. There are lots of stories of people with heart transplants who ended up remembering details about the former owner of that specific heart. They might even change character altogether. Or in the case of this little boy: start calling out to total strangers, believing they were his parents, leaving his actual parents (who were with him) flabbergasted, no doubt. And the miracle is: those strangers - they were indeed the parents of the boy who died, and who's heart was now beating in the chest of the boy standing in front of them.
It can be either two, its just what you decide to believe in. What you decide to be. Believer or sceptic. Or both, depending on the subject. In this case, I love to believe.
When I was in the shop with my friend, I also bought a necklace for myself. It's a simple black string with a pendant of an elephant.
I know that the elephant is used as a symbol. But I couldn’t actually recall what for. Thanks to
I can now tell you that it stands for strength, loyalty, good memory, patience, wisdom and marital fidelity.
The elephant is also part of many religions.
For the hindoes the elephant stands for the power of holy wisdom, general wisdom, royal dignity, and invincible power, for a long and lasting life, immortality and overcoming death.
In Buddhism the elephant is sacred, because of the birth of Buddha which was announced with a white elephant. It also symbolizes patience, love, and goodness.
For the Chinese the elephant represents good sense, energy, and supreme power.
The Greek and Romans believe that the elephant is an attribute of the God Mercury, and also stands for intelligence.
The Christians don´t have a specific role for the elephant in their religion, but when he does appear, it reflects the image of Christ, who treads on the hostile snake of the devil.
The tales of the Middleages speak of the elephant as a symbol of chastity, because of the belief that the male elephant gives up on sex during the two years the female carries a baby.
For me it stands for kindness, strength, love and energy.
My aim is to be a kind person, love everyone in my community, even when I don’t always succeed. Then I just call on the universe to give me strength and energy to follow my own path, no matter where it leads.
Paulo Coelho tweeted recently:
Be proud of your scars.
We all have our scars.
Being a redhead, I have been picked on a lot while growing up. This wasn't easy, and because I was a shy kid, I didn't have the guts and strength to fight the bullies. Instead, I swallowed all they yelled at me. And really believed this was the truth: redheads are ugly, and not worth while. I hated my red hair, I hated my freckles. My self-esteem was a pilot light which I didn't believe could turn into a flame again. But during all of this there was always: music.
I was 12, and Doe Maar (a Dutch band who turned almost every girl on fire) was hot and booming.
The girls at school had their diaries filled with pictures of frontmen Hennie and Ernst. And we wrote things under them, like "he's mine".
Thank the Heavens for music.
After Doe Maar split up, there was a slight shift to The Golden Earring, another Dutch band. But honestly, only the video that came with the song "When the lady smiles" did it for me. I was a teenager with her cheeky moments, and the image of one of the band members tearing off the robe of a nun’s body, while exposing a red bra... was huge. And obviously, with a Catholic upbringing, this was nothing less than God-awful in my parents – especially my dad’s – eyes. Which was a bonus.
There was: Wham!
Thank the Heavens for music!
I don't think I was quite prepared for what those guys (and especially George's appearance) did for me. They offered an escape from the real world. They offered lovelyness. Heavenly bliss. They offered me song and dance. A Fantasy. Just for me.
Picture me in my room, a brush in hand, dancing on my bed, singing at the top of my lungs.
"I don't want your freeeedom, I don't want to play around, I don't want nobody baby..."
Or for those of you who only know the most obvious hits:
"You put the boom-boom into my heart. You send my soul sky high when your loving starts. A jitterbug into my brain. Yeah-Yeah..."
George in shorts, pink shirt, yellow gloves, a tanned body, bright smile, and sparkling eyes - what else could a girl want? And boys, as it turned out. Nowadays I ask myself: yellow gloves, PINK shirt - what were you thinking? But at the time, the only thing my body screemed, was: hell yeah!
It won’t take a genius to figure out I was quite the silent "I’ll just enjoy myself in my room" kind of girl. It was easier to lose myself in a fantasy, create another world, than to expose myself to the world of bullies and heartbreak. And I did so by singing and dancing on my bed. By translating lyrics. By writing poems...
Fortunately, in between George, fantasies of real love (three attempts in finding real love ended up in me crying my eyes out on my bed), longing and dreaming, I started to join the working life when I was 19, and there he was: this guy with sparkling eyes, a contagious sense of humour, and addictive kisses. Plus he was REAL. No fantasy. My lips and hips always wanted more. And to this day, my heart truly believes that we are destined to be together.
No fantasy could beat this. No dream could replace this. Goodbye to bullies, hello to sweetness. It took me a while, but bit by bit I became aware that I did matter.
The precious moments, the amazement, the predicaments – it has made me who I am. And with that thought I like to aknowledge that little shy, freckle-faced girl who slowly turned into, well, me! I believe in that dreamy little girl, spangled with stars.
Do you believe in yourself? You should. And remember:
Fight for your dreams, and they will fight for you.